Almost daily I find myself thinking about the Marines I served with. To say I was surrounded by America's finest would be an understatement.
One day last week, the memory of a particular small team leader came to mind. Something he said made such an impression that it influenced how I would approach leadership positions for the remainder of my career. He probably never even knew it.
I decided to look him up.
After some searching, I found his obituary. He passed away about six months ago, and it made me sad I wouldn’t be able to reconnect with him. From what I read he was the same guy I knew way back when.
I had wanted to let him know that despite the many years that had passed, I could still see his face and hear his words the day he knocked on my office door.
I was surprised to see him when I looked up. He was not one to show up in the office, and I instantly knew that something significant was going on.
I invited him in and told him to have a seat. He came in but stated he’d be more comfortable standing.
He had something he needed to say and didn’t want to linger. This wasn’t meant to be a catch-up session. He wanted to get in and get out before anyone saw him.
I won’t forget what he said.
“You may think you know what’s going on with the company, but I’m pretty sure you don’t. I don’t know what the other leaders are telling you, but whatever it is it’s not entirely accurate, sir.”
Gut punch. I didn’t know what to say.
He laid out a few things that were going on that he felt were detrimental to our team and our mission. These were serious concerns; not some whining from a disgruntled employee or chronic complainer.
I had always spoken about the “team”, and he articulated a few things that were not in alignment with that ideal. Things he was observing and experiencing from where the rubber meets the road. That place where all the fancy words and vision statements were filtered and met the realities of the day-to-day.
I did some digging and sure enough, the issues he described were there. What I couldn't see was suddenly revealed.
Expectations were clarified and the problems handled.
Thank goodness he spoke up when he did. We might have ended up in a rut and the longer it went on, the longer it would have taken to rectify.
From that day forward, I made a point of identifying "reality checkers" every time I went to a new team.
People not afraid to speak up when something is off.
People confident enough to speak plainly.
People more concerned about the team than potentially hurting my feelings.
I can recount every single one of them.
None of them knew the role they were filling. But if I wanted a ground truth perspective as to what was going on or what was being projected, they were my first stop.
They’re out there if you look for them and are worth their weight in gold.
These people protect teams and protect leaders from themselves.
But in my experience, they are never the loudest voices in the room. Their eyes and ears are open more than their mouths.
Rarely do they announce their presence. You have to seek them out.
And when they finally decide to speak up, leaders would be wise to listen carefully.
Looking back, I can easily see the significance of what happened that day.
I wish I could have thanked him.
If this reflection made you think of another leader who might see value in it, please forward it to them.
Dan
Advisor to Leaders
A steady presence when the weight of leadership gets heavy